What does your crazy look like?

Hi there.

It's like I've been avoiding you. Well, not you, but the internet. Well, not the internet, but this blog.

Should I tell you that life has been crazy, getting in the way of all my over-sharing? It's true, but everyone's life is crazy. Should I tell you that a temp agency had me running around in circles last week for a very temporary job that they ended up filling internally? (Can I express to you how much I have come to loathe the phrase We have filled the position internally over the past nine months? Sure, for those on the internal-side of things, it's good news. But after three quarters of a year spent looking for work, it just doesn't sit well. Oh, how I long to be on the internal side of something. I'm tired of looking in from the edges.)

The rest of my week was usual, run-of-the-mill kind of crazy. There was a tea party with new friends, a birthday party for two of my favourite little boys (even if we forgot their cards at home), some painting, some princess movies, and a shopping date with Matt (a romantic trip to the Gap). I like this kind of crazy. I'll take it most days of the week.

But it has also been a week heavy with planning for Our Future, as in, what are our next steps going to be? I'm piecing together a couple part-time jobs that, sadly, don't do much in the way of supporting our family of four. I'm still applying for new positions and following new leads every week, but we really do need a new approach. At some point I need to admit that what I'm doing isn't working. Matt and I have been brainstorming a bit, even thinking about jobs that he might apply for, as we approach the last stages of the permanent residency process. Can I get an AMEN to sharing the job search load? It's really one of the nicest feelings in the world, allowing my shoulders to relax just a bit. I now have a new appreciation for how Matt must have felt looking for permanent academic work in Delaware. Now that we have a family, there is just so much riding on the income we bring home.

So we've been brainstorming. It feels a bit sneaky making new plans, taking my mind of the day-to-day job search just for a moment. I'm not taking about another big move or anything, and no, we're not sneaking in a third child (yet). All I'm saying is that our family needs a new approach.

Any ideas?