Soon

In two weeks we'll be living in our new apartment.  We'll have been living her at my mum's for eight months. Add to that the two months me and the girls lived here while Matt was teaching in Europe, and that makes a long year for everyone. Can I just say an enormous thank you to my mother and stepfather? Thank you. We're a lot to handle some days, I know. We're loud, always in the kitchen, go through laundry at warp speed, and, the toys. But they have welcomed us unconditionally this past year and that has made my heart feel so much better.

We're ready to move (at least mentally, because, well, packing). Me and the girls have spent approximately 346, 234 hours in this house together, mostly while everyone else is at work. I can't lie, it's been a challenge some days. We're without a car while Matt is communting and in the suburbs that means you mostly hang out at home. We're only a few minutes away from Alyce's school and a twenty minute walk (an hour, kid-walk speed) from the library, so we're by no means stranded. But we aren't wandering around a city the way I'd like to be. Parents come in all shapes and sizes, but my preference is to keep moving, adventuring if you will. Alyce and Shira are excellent tag-alongs on an adventure, as long as I keep them in snacks and flower-picking breaks. We do best near water, in parks, museums, friends houses (can we come over?), and anywhere near good food. And while I haven't taken them to an outdoor music festival, I think their natural rhythm and near-constant urge to dance would make them feel right at home.

Now don't get me wrong. I love home. I love my mum's home and I'll love our new home in Toronto. I love slow mornings, hiding in bed reading books, or spending hours in the kitchen. Home is a good, good place. But you and I both know that feeling trapped in one place can challenge even the most homebody of homebodies. So we're getting set for some changes. We're packing. We're making plans. And I'm creating a very long list of adventures we'll take once we're back on the mothership in the city.
 

But for two more weeks we'll make our own fun here.

This week in stay-at-home parenting

 There were many walks to and from school. The snail pace at which we moved gave me a chance to welcome the sun back into my life. I feel as though it had been grey for years.

We enjoyed spending time with some friends amidst the chaos of the bookstore-turned-playdate venue. These crazy new bookstores reel you in with giant tea cups and enormous train tables, but then they get back as you purchase your weight in books on your way out. Here Alyce is reading to her friend my most hated Barbie story, wherein girls at a charm school stab each other in the backs in order to get ahead. I don't allow it in our home so she's taking full advantage of its availability at Chapters.

 The Children coloured approximately 2,293 pictures of the following: butterflies, rainbows, bees, trees, ponies, and princesses. And one stunning portrait of a baby we know. I will be talking about this for a long time, so bear with me, but watching Alyce go from squiggles to elaborate (humour me) portraits of people we know astounds me. I just can't comprehend how she's gone from being a baby who eats crayons to drawing, if you will, masterpieces.

 With my first full week at home with the girls I took advantage of the extra time in the kitchen. This past Wednesday found me and Shira in the kitchen (Alyce was at school), where we made tomato soup and oat bread in time to enjoy for lunch. I'd love to offer you a recipe for the tomato soup, but I would be embarrassed to call it a "recipe." Instead I'll call dressing up a can of whole tomatoes with a some onions, a little olive oil, some stock and some cream. But it was exactly what I wanted. And one of the reasons that Shira is one of my two favourite daughters is our shared love of all food. She literally threw herself into our lunch. A perfect date.

And I would also like to point out that we discovered green things growing in the woods next to Alyce's school. Green things do not grow in Canadian Februaries, but here is the proof. I think even the leaves must have been excited that it was Tu B'Shevat. 

Lest you think that our week was all sunshine and artistry, I'll share with you the following story: On the morning of the bookstore play date, after dashing like a madwoman to get the three of us dressed, snacked up and in the car, and after chasing these two around aisles of books for an hour, I finally managed to carry Shira, my bag, a coffee (obviously), and Alyce out of the store and back into the car. It sounds easy when you say like that, but it wasn't. Shira won't walk holding my hand for more than a few steps, so I have to carry her everywhere (why oh why do I always leave my Ergo in the car?); I was determined to finish my coffee, so there goes my other hand. Always the model of safety, I asked Alyce to hold on to my jacket while we walked through the parking lot to get to the car. We were a sight. So we're finally in the car, all of us buckled into their seats, when Alyce comes out with this: Mama, I probably should have told you before we left the store, but I need to pee. Bad. For thirty seconds I cursed loudly in my head, cried out in horror, again, in my head, and then got over myself and admitted that we were all heading back into the store. Honestly, it made me laugh a lot.

How was your week? Are you ready for the next one?

New routines

Alyce asked me yesterday if any of the Grand River ducks would like some of her stickers. I told her if they didn't want some of her stickers then they were cruel, soul-less creatures. Actually, I told her that we can't litter stickers in the river, but I wanted to say the other thing. It was a mild and un-January like day, and since we had some time between appointments in the afternoon (a doctor and a swim class), we took advantage of the opportunity to take a walk by the river.

This week is my first real welcome back to staying home with The Children during the day. I am doing some contract work that I can work on in the evenings and I've sent Matt out to find a job. I know from experience that looking for work takes a lot of time and energy, so I've given Matt the space to spend the days doing all the things one does to find work (researching positions, making contacts, submitting applications). He did that for me while he stayed home with Alyce and Shira, so now it is my turn. I have a good feeling about him, as though a really amazing opportunity is going to open up. He deserves it.

Isn't it strange trying to figure out if it's best to work and pay for daycare, or have one parent stay home with your children? Daycare is so much money (and difficult to find at all if you didn't get your name on a list years before), never mind the maneuvering to find care for Alyce before and after kindergarten on the days she's in school. Honestly, it makes my brain hurt. I know a lot parents both work because in addition to the income they enjoy the work they do (but I imagine it is still hard for  a parent to know that they're bringing home only a few hundred dollars after daycare costs). I know that one day this will be the case for Matt and I, but for the time being I'm going to stay home with these two while Matt works. I must admit: I love staying home with them. Even on days, like yesterday, when Alyce tried my patience and argued with me approximately 439 times, it was good to be here.

Today is a school day, so it's an even softer welcome back to home week for me. Shira is happy to be my sidekick, and even accepted my invitation for a hair cut (see her before and after pictures above). She is over the moon that my boobs I am home with her again and we're redeveloping a routine. So far today it involves a little cleaning, some cooking, trying on every hat and mitten in the house, and, this afternoon, a trip to return our library books. But for the time being, she naps.

Please keep it between us that Shira is sleeping with Alyce's unicorn.

An handsome man

Trying to charm me on my birthday, and relieved to be free of The Children. That's not a small glass of wine, either.

This post is dedicated to Matt, hands down the world's greatest (and most handsome) stay-at-home Papa and house husband. He loves his girls more than anything, I know, but I also know that he'd like absolutely nothing more than to be working (far) away from the house. At a job where he gets paid actual money. Is this too much to ask? Hardly.

So please join me in reminding my husband that he is doing an incredible job staying home with Alyce and Shira. Things feel hard some days, but we are all thankful for the things you do. xxx