You know what I haven't written about much lately? Parenting. Yes, that's right, I have two children and we spend a lot of time together. You must be tired of me going on and on about myself lately, am I right (maybe don't answer that)? No matter how relieved I have been to return to Toronto, life has felt awfully heavy lately, sort of molasses-like. I'm dragging a bit, can you tell?
One of the markers of parenthood for me is how no matter what else is going on in my life, my young children don't care. Struggling with new career steps? Not their concern. Worrying about a decision you made two years ago? They'd rather paint. I should rephrase that part about caring, though, because while they don't care in that traditional "what accommodations can we make to help you through this transition" kind of way, they'll get right and dirty to help me relax and get over myself. Feeling a bit indecisive about life lately? I suggest you take your four year old to an outdoor showing of The Lorax, popcorn and cookies included. Having a rough day managing deadlines? Relax a minute and just get under the covers with your two year old already. Read that book together, you know you'll feel better. This isn't about playing the role of martyr and ignoring all those very real grown-up concerns, but taking full opportunity of the way my children know how to take care of me. Sure, Alyce can't carry on a decent conversation about savings accounts, but she did make me fourteen drawings last week, with no less than 6442 hearts. I'd be silly not to take that therapy when it's being excitedly thrown at me each day after school.
I started this blog as a way to remember the details of our chaos and lately I've had a few moments that have left me hoping that I don't forget any of it. Do you know that feeling? I'm going about my day when all of a sudden I find myself in the middle of an act or experience or sentence that I know--I just know--I'll want to keep with me. None of these moments are transformational or even original. I expect that parents the world over have felt the same way with their own children, in that universal way in which parents are made to smile that soft, knowing smile as they watch their children be, well, children.
Like yesterday when Alyce's kindergarten teacher informed me that Alyce has been hiding her own possessions in the lost and found box, again. This time it was her lunch bag. She does this because she finds such delight in the act of solving the mystery of her missing item. She's lost and found multiple pairs of shoes, mittens, more than one jacket. Come to think of it we're currently "missing" a few items right now. Thanks, Alyce. Or how a friend noticed yesterday that Shira rolls her eyes back into her head a bit as she descends into a kiss. Ecstasy, these kisses are to Shira, she could give them all day long. Then there
Yes, Shira, it certainly is. And today I'll take an extra moment to remember that.