Pages

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

So I've been avoiding you

Dear blog:

I've become very fond of you in this short time we've been together. You know how much I like to write, and as a trained academic I can enjoy (or, loathe) some good critical self-reflection as much as the next girl. I started this blog for many reasons. Some days this is about joining a conversation that, until now, I've only eagerly watched from the sidelines. Sure I've commented now and then and reached out to a few people, but for the most part I've been silent, and as hard as it is to admit sometimes, lonely. It's been two years since I arrived in the U.S. and it has taken me as long to begin meeting some new friends. I love my husband. A lot. But Matt has had to serve as husband, co-parent, best friend, casual acquaintance, walking buddy, food-tester, masseuse, and co-conspirator. He needs a break, don't you think? But no pressure.

Blog, you know as well as I do that I'm here because I wanted some space with room enough to say out loud I'm making some big changes. That's it, you've heard it here first (all three of you): I have decided to stop working on my PhD after six years (finally, sighs Matt, who has been listening to me go back and forth on this one for a very long time). I will not continue writing my dissertation or pursue academic jobs. I will try something else. And blog, this is where you come in. I have ruminated quietly about this for so long and gotten no where, so it's time to try something different.

So naturally I've been avoiding you. Coming to terms with this decision has been a challenge (that might be an understatement) and what has surprised me so much in the short time since I've started this blog is just how important honesty is. Is it strange that it feels impossible to lie to you? Shouldn't the relative anonymity of a blog give me some freedom to stretch the truth a bit? Couldn't I make myself more courageous than I feel? Nope.

But I've started this and you can't be rid of me that easily. So expect me back here tomorrow, and maybe even the day after that.

d

8 comments:

  1. Okay, so I've been reading along here, but since I haven't commented in a while, you have no idea that when I read this post, I thought, "Oh my gosh, YES!!" Congratulations on having the courage to make a very difficult decision. Have you ever heard the This American Life episode about quitting? Check it out. I can't wait to hear more about this mystery "something else."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MY HUSBAND IS BACK AFTER TWO YEARS OF BREAKUP...I AM SO HAPPY
      Hello everyone my name is Rose Carmody from Australia, i came across this man called Dr. Ugo Wonders through a Lady here online and she said he helped her bring back her lost love,i don't believe in this but i come to think about it and use faith and hope to contact this man last 2 weeks,i have lost my husband for 2 years even he is trying to get married to another lady in Sydney, Australia..i quickly rush and email Dr. Ugo Wonders for help and i thought its still a freak because i don't really believe he can bring him back to me because its too long we have contacted each other,we only comment on each other status on facebook and when ever he come online he has never talk anything about coming back to me,now i really believe that there is Magic and Dr. Ugo Wonders is a really God sent and has Magic because all these things is still like a dream to me,Dr.Ugo told me in the first mail that everything will be fine,i called him and he assured me. i had so many doubt but now am happy. i can't believe my love broke up with this lady and he is back to me and he can't even explain how everything goes all he said to me is that he want my love back,i am really happy. I cried so much because it was just like i am born a new and am really happy and my entire family are happy for me but they never know whats the secret behind this...i want you all divorce lady or single mother to please contact this man for help and everything will be fine i really guarantee you..i have told 2 of my friends who are in unhappy relationship and they have seen solution in few days ago...if you want to contact him you can reach him through his email at generalspelltemple@gmail.com or his mobile number on +1 386-336-9876 that is where you can get to him and i assure you it gonna work fine with you and you will be happy i am out of words am just happy and i will be happy forever because i can never have any problem having this man. once again you can contact Dr. Ugo Wonders on generalspelltemple@gmail.com or his mobile number on +1 386-336-9876 Rose is my Name

      Delete
  2. Thanks, Jess. I will check that out!

    I wish I could tell you that I'm training to be a spy, or even a food blogger, but alas, I'm taking a different path. More on that soon!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am Movaya from U.S.A,
    Dr OKORO is a relationship and marriage expert with years of experience in training and helping couples.He has helped countless individuals and organizations around the world, offering effective and efficient solutions for healthy and successful relationships and marriage. His mission is to brings back lost lovers,reunite and provide inspiration, support and empowerment to everyone on their journey to a great marriage life.He is a featured present owner of okorohomeofrefuge.com, a reliable resource to support healthy, happy marriages and relationships,email for help,okorohomeofrefuge@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Am SIVILYA from UK,Once upon a time in Ottawa,when my husband whom i married for more than 16 good years started acting funny cheating on me and even planing of running out of marriage,abandoning me and our 3 children i tried all i could to talk to him and make him see reasons with me why he should hold-on to this marriage we have build together for years in good and bad time he never listen to me even when families,friends and relatives also talk to him...i was feed>up and confused and i do not know what to do until a friend introduce me to a spell-caster Dr IRABOR,Who helped me to restore and re>unite my broken marriage by spell-casting...today all my problems are over THANK YOU,Am so happy i was introduced to you in my days of marriage problem,all i can say is THANK YOU,My husband is stake to me permanently for ever...email iraborspelltemple@gmail.com,He is also helping people with childlessness problems,,,email Dr IRABOR on iraborspelltemple@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. MY HUSBAND IS BACK AFTER TWO YEARS OF BREAKUP...I AM SO HAPPY
    Hello everyone my name is Rose Carmody from Australia, i came across this man called Dr. Ugo Wonders through a Lady here online and she said he helped her bring back her lost love,i don't believe in this but i come to think about it and use faith and hope to contact this man last 2 weeks,i have lost my husband for 2 years even he is trying to get married to another lady in Sydney, Australia..i quickly rush and email Dr. Ugo Wonders for help and i thought its still a freak because i don't really believe he can bring him back to me because its too long we have contacted each other,we only comment on each other status on facebook and when ever he come online he has never talk anything about coming back to me,now i really believe that there is Magic and Dr. Ugo Wonders is a really God sent and has Magic because all these things is still like a dream to me,Dr.Ugo told me in the first mail that everything will be fine,i called him and he assured me. i had so many doubt but now am happy. i can't believe my love broke up with this lady and he is back to me and he can't even explain how everything goes all he said to me is that he want my love back,i am really happy. I cried so much because it was just like i am born a new and am really happy and my entire family are happy for me but they never know whats the secret behind this...i want you all divorce lady or single mother to please contact this man for help and everything will be fine i really guarantee you..i have told 2 of my friends who are in unhappy relationship and they have seen solution in few days ago...if you want to contact him you can reach him through his email at generalspelltemple@gmail.com or his mobile number on +1 386-336-9876 that is where you can get to him and i assure you it gonna work fine with you and you will be happy i am out of words am just happy and i will be happy forever because i can never have any problem having this man. once again you can contact Dr. Ugo Wonders on generalspelltemple@gmail.com or his mobile number on +1 386-336-9876 Rose is my Name

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi i am JULIE JONES from US I have just experience the wonders of Dr.UGO ANDREW love spell, that have been spread on the INTERNET and worldwide, How he marvelously helped people all over the world to restored back their marriage life and get back lost lovers, and also help to win lottery. I contacted him after going through so many testimonies from different people how he help to bring back ex lover back, i told him about my husband that abandoned me about 3 years ago, and left home with all i had.. Dr UGO ANDREW only told me to smile and have a rest of mind he will handle all in just 24 hours, After the second day my husband called me, i was just so shocked, i pick the call and couldn't believe my ears, he was really begging me to forgive him and making promises on phone.. He came back home and also got me a new car just for him to proof his love for me. i was so happy and called Dr UGO ANDREW and thanked him, he only told me to share the good news all over the world. ( He can also launch other similar spells)
    Love Spells
    Lottery Spells
    winning court case
    Divorce spells
    Success
    Money rituals
    Low sperm count
    Infertility in women
    Breast enlargement/reduction
    Penis enlargement/reduction
    Health, Well Being
    Protection, Healing
    Curses, Hex, Breakups
    NEW! Combo Spells
    High Priestess Spells
    Vampire Spells
    Authentic Voodoo Spells
    Custom, Other Spells
    Business spells
    Health/Healing spells
    Curse removal
    Job spells

    Contact Email: generalspelltemple@gmail.com

    Mobile Number: +1386-336-9876

    ReplyDelete
  7. (No subject)

    [Draft]
    This message hasn't been sent.Saved on: Mon 12/11/2017, 6:48 PM
    my husband of 9 years left me just because i could not give him A child, i did all i could to make sure i give him a child, i even went to an extent of forcing him to have sex with me every night but could not work. not until one evening when i was browsing through the internet, i saw a comment on how a woman in same problem like mine was made home by A man called lord amadi . i read about him and decided to contact him for help, i did as he ask me to do but i was still wondering how can someone just bring back my love he don't even know but i keep doing as he ask me to do. i was very surprise one morning my husband came and started begging me to come back to his life. at first i pretend to be angry then i accepted him back. lord amadi also cast a spell for me to make me have children and as i speak right now i am a mother with 3kids. if there is any one out there who needs his help you can contact him through his personal EMAIL: lordamadi@outlook.com. phone: +2349066148726. i wish you good luck

    ReplyDelete